Orthodox jewish dating customs

For example, the men and women ask each other pointed questions such as, “What do you see as your role as the wife? ” or, “Are you willing to work so I can continue to study? The ensuing conversations may even border on confrontational from the viewer’s perspective, though the participants don’t seem to mind.They’ve got one to three dates to decide their marital futures and Haredi matchmaking rules are specific.Last week, just before Thanksgiving, the president-elect named Betsy De Vos, a billionaire education reform activist and champion of charter schools and public funding for…

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Such is the case with the 2013 Israeli documentary film “Match Made in Heaven,” directed by Ronnie Kay.

Kay, a secular Israeli, was given first-time media access to the matchmaking culture in the Ultra Orthodox community in Israel.

The search for a spouse can be a difficult process for many men and women.

In recent years, it has been observed that a growing number of individuals in the Modern Orthodox Jewish community attempt to find spouses but are unsuccessful.

The conversations between these young adults aged 19-24 are direct and insightful.

Without any romantic experience – touching of any kind is strictly verboten – they are surprisingly mature.

“Then you’re already considered second-rate,” the manicurist responds.

This is offensive to the viewer, who is suprisingly more shocked when Merav simply replies: “Exactly.” This is one example of the matter-of-factness about the purpose of marriage that pervades the film.

Singles communities were seen as beneficial, but somehow artificial as well.

Singles felt they were viewed as inferior by the larger community and were often troubled by loneliness and isolation.

Family background, expectations and conforming to well-defined roles matter more than instant emotional attachment or physical chemistry.